talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
