office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
