how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
