My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I cut my penus on the lid.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Randomize
