just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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