Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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