i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
