She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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