I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
