He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Randomize
