everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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