never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
