I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
