super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
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