Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
