like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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