Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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