I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
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