STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
