Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
