She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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