Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize