We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
