I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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