She went from zero to smokin in five shots
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
i believe in u and ur pee
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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