Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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