tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
