Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
