Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
