My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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