Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
no, he came in my armpit
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
