I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
