she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
me + whiskey = a bad person
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Randomize
