You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
