I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
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