Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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