Pappa wants mamma naked
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
We left an ass print on the piano.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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