Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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