last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
When did angry sex become our thing?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
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