R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
