I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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