Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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