Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
