Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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