am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
