how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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