My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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