You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
