Don't you send me to vm
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
