are you still at the devil's house?
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
